alam mo yun???

alam mo ba yung feeling na gustong-gusto mo mag-yosi dahil super nastre-stress ka na? kase ngaun nararamdaman ko na naman yun e. honestly speaking, nakaka-badtrip talaga ang mga tao na nagsasabe ng oo sa isang bagay tapos magca-cancel na lang din naman pala. thank you ha, napa-asa pa ko. edi sana, sinabe nyo na lang agad na hindi, para sana hindi na ko nag-expect.

CRAP! this is non-sense venting i say.

please just don’t ruin my birthday.

yeah, i’m gonna invite you, but dear just don’t go ruining it for me. cause if you do, i swear i’ll make your life a whole lot miserable than you might imagine.

sometimes love it knocks you down…

well lets jut say that i am really doing some awful thinkig. and you know what.lets just say that im such a fucked up person to say that yes i am BISEXUAL. happy with that. its just that fine i havent really tried being on a relationship with a girl, but sure as hell that i had relationships with boys. and well ets just say that boys are sometimes just the most wonderful things in a spur of a moment and a freaking nightmare the next. bu i had fallen for a girl before. im that twisted of a peson.

well the reason im saying this is because im kinda really havng a hard time these days. its like my heart has been torn apart by a boy who hadnt done anything at all. and the thing is im starting to have freaking doubts about if id try to fall for another anytime soon. and the thing is im just fucked up and wasted with the wole thing so i just wanna vent allthis out. no sense foyou but for me it makes a lot of difference.

broken bonds

to start things off, the reason why i have been really down and uncaring lately is because i am fed up with somebody. 

i am starting to loss my trust in J. its just because his over sensitivity towards what we say about him and his lack of sensitivity from what he is saying is the cause of this.  im a good friend but when you hit me below the belt and you still haven’t realize it, then that’s where were going to have  a problem. 

well to just give a gist of this whole thing - too much familiarity leads to disgust and broken bonds cant be easily mended-

Swine Flu

ok so i was chatting with my good friend, and one of the TOOKs, mai when she told me about the news that A(H1N1) or more commonly known as swine flu have hit DLSU. i was really shocked. at first, i thought it was just a joke. like some prank spam messages being passed around. then i heard it on the news. OMG! it true. and take note, classes has been like suspended for around ten days. and i think all things are under observation. GOSH!!! then i was reading some stats and comments in facebook saying stuff like they are wishing it hits their school as well. AND I WAS LIKE THINKING… DUH!!! WOULD YOU WANT TO BE AFFECTED BY THIS DISEASE? i am not one of those people that love school and stuff like that. BUT! i wouldnt wish a catastrophe would hit my school just to have no classes and have a vacation longer than usual.

well im really thinking how shallow would it be if you would wish that a disease would hit your school. well im not saying any names here cause i wouldnt want to offend people. but honey this are my thoughts and im really damn against it hitting philipines. i really hope that the case wouldnt spread and i really hope it doesnt hit any of my friends, family, acquaintances and just about everybody i know and have a connection with. cause this is not a joke. it means that we are in danger and as far as i read in the net. there is still no cure nor vaccine against A(H1N1) viru. so baby think before you wish for something you might regret. 

sorry but i have to say this.

ok so ganito kasi yan. im a good friend pero theres like an extent lang na pwede kong maitolerate yung mga kagagahan nya. anu ba its been THREE LONG YEARS  di ako santo na hindi magtatampo at mag rereact ng masama kung nafefeel ko na, na hindi mo man lang pinapahalagahan yang sarili mo. mahal kita. pero hindi kita makakausap ngayon. masyado na akong naubusan ng masasabi sayo.
wag mo ng hayaan na saktan ka pa nya. matutu kang magmahal ng iba. napakadame pa dyan. at ALAM mo ang DAHILAN kung bakit hindi pwede kayo maging kayo. WALA akong karapatan na magsalita sa love or anything because i know that i still have a lot to learn at masyado akong mabilis magkagusto at magsawa sa isang tao. pero ito ang alam ko. kahit mahal ko ang isang tao, hindi ko sya hahayan na saktan ako ng sobra pa sa kaya kong matngap. ciguro nga d q pa naramdaman ang naramdaman mo para dyan sa taong yan. pero i think and feel that i can distinguish LOVE from OBSESSESSION.
matawag mo man akong masamang kaibigan dahil tatalikdan kita kung kelan mo ko kelangan, pero matatawag naman din kitang ganun. hindi mo ba naisip na nasaktan din anamn ako nang hindi mo man lang pinakikingan yung mga payo ko. at hindi mo man lang ba naisip na sadyang pinagisipan at hinugot ko pa un sa kasulok-sulukan ng puso ko para lang may maitulong ako sa yo.
baka magkaroon ng oras n kainin ko lahat ng sinasabi ko dito. pero just let me vent this out. because i had enough of this crap.

why did i create this blog?

 why did i create this blog?…

hmmm… one of the reasons is privacy, i have other blog accounts but i want something new and a little private. the next is that i want to have a little space. and this site offer a more personalized domain. I also  need a little place to let myself out.

so… while creating this account i was really into to edge of typing out the words i want to say for a long time…

the thing is that the start of this year is really bad for me… especially my luck. last week has been one of the worst week ever for me. it all started with pictures that have been erased without your knowledge, getting a head on encounter with what you are trying to avoid, getting a call from a person you are trying to run away from. that will just get you and  i was really stressing over petty matters and i was feeling crap.

badluck in love life, schoolwork, family problems, unfriendly encounters, lossing the sense of belongingness.

i might say that if i am the one who will read this blog, i would also say that this is just too shallow. but try having it for a whole week straight ang still counting it. wont you feel pissed off, cheated and just plain wrong.

i love taking snapshots of people and pictures of me with my friends. but when you dont even have a copy of a recent photo you just took and that photo is with someone you really like… grrrr… that is just so great and fabulous! harhar

im a pretty territorial person, my being an only child might explain that part, but i just cant get territorial over something that isn’t yours.  i have someone, a friend, i like him to the point i cant loose him. almost everybody already know that i like him, and i feel that what i feel for him is much deeper than what i am willing to show. but having a friend that almost fell the same way as you do for that someone, will make you put on your brakes. then you would know, that the guy already have a special someone that he is just isn’t willing to let you know. damn thats just too great. then a friend will start teasing you about what you feel and everything will just get too complicated.

then everything will just become pretty unfair. wont you feel that the world is making fun of you? wont you feel that karma has been multiplied over a threefold? wont you feel cheated by fate? 

this post is going nowhere, its just a need to vent out and feel a little calmer. oh! and wait i just want to share that i cut my hair yesterday. one of the ways i feel that my problems might go away.